My nephew Marc is getting married today to his childhood sweetheart Kara.  I don’t know much about my middle brother’s youngest son except for the stories shared by his dad and the few times we’ve interacted at his college football games or family visits.  I moved away from Northern California to Boston when he was just 3 years old and additional moves to Long Beach and Portland resulted in but a few times to connect.  In fact, I can’t think of a time when it was just the two of us hanging out without another family member around.  Today, will likely be no different because you’re going to be surrounded by family and friends and rightfully celebrating with your new bride.  So, I thought I’d dedicate this blog post to you and provide some unsolicited marriage advice from your well-meaning Uncle.

No truer words were ever written than, “Happy wife, happy life.”  Take time with Kara.  Listen to her.  Pay attention.  Giving in to her wants and needs is not being “pussy whipped” as many of your macho friends might say.  The love and support you gain will return to you double.  I know from experience how miserable things can become for you if you don’t make Kara your priority.  In the end, all anyone really wants is to be made to feel special.  I sometimes need to take my own advice here so that’s one of the biggest reasons I’m sharing this with you.

Be tough during the tough times.  There will be tough times.  They may not be there now but one day they will come.  There are no such things as fairy tales.  I’m not wishing anything bad for you, of course, rather struggle is a part of everyone’s life and you should be prepared for it.  Rather, my point is how you deal with strife will make or break your marriage.  Every decision you make from this day forward will have a direct impact on both of your lives.  Be a “be there” husband.  It’s during these times of difficulty which you can really make a difference and deepen your love for one another.

I really have no business offering advice about being a parent except this.  You don’t have to have kids.  You both may want them and have them and that’s fine.  But, if you aren’t both fully committed to raising a family it’s OK that you don’t.  My dear wife and I made a conscious choice and sure there are times when we have wished things worked out differently but, in the end, we made the right choice for us.  And really that’s the best advice I can give you, Nephew, make the right choice for YOU and KARA.  No one else but you two.

Save for a rainy day.  You’ll be surprised one day to find yourself nearing retirement like me and you will want to face that day with a strong financial portfolio.  You’ll want to spend your retirement years in a beautiful place like here in Hawaii without concern about money.  Invest wisely and save, and spend your golden years in luxury and not on the street holding up a sign that says, “Will work for food.”

Take care of your health and your wife’s health.  Once you lose your physical condition you pretty much lose everything.  Eat right, drink in moderation, take care of your body.  Get regular dental and medical check ups. Your dear, old, Uncle, follows mostly this advice but knows he can do better here as well.  Just know this, you’ll want to live a long life and enjoy all that this life has to offer but you have to be in shape and you need to have a few bucks saved up.  See previous paragraph.

I’m getting close to getting off my soapbox, kid.  Know this, I love you and Kara.  I wish you the kind of happiness and love and health and wealth your Auntie and I have and more.  I’m very proud of you and know you’ll carry on the Baker tradition of living life to its fullest.  Smile.  Laugh.  Love.  Enjoy this day and make your marriage a lifetime of memories.

Love, Uncle C

“Have you no sense of decency, sir? At long last, have you left no sense of decency?”

Senator Joseph Welch to Senator Joe McCarthy on June 9, 1954.

The same questions should be asked of President Tweet. The list of indecent things he has said or done are without precedent from the leader of the United States of America.  Some of the more incredulous include:

• Referring to Haiti and countries in Africa as “shithole countries”
• Bragging about the size of his ‘nuclear button’
• Telling the NFL to fire players who protest against police violence and the oppression of African-Americans
• Repeatedly calling various media outlets like the Washington Post, the NY Times, and CNN “fake news”
• Saying the licenses for NBC and other broadcast news networks should be challenged and when he banned the New York Times and others from a press briefing
• Giving his daughter and son in-law White House roles
• Accusing protesters of being paid
• Attacking a Federal judge because he blocked Trump’s initial travel ban
• Falsely accusing former President Barack Obama of wiretapping him
• Discussing a response to North Korea’s missile test at dinner at his resort in Mar-a-lago
• Claim negative polls are fake
• Attack companies and celebrities like Amazon, Nordstrom, Meryl Streep, and Arnold Schwarzenegger
• Claim millions of people voted illegally (after he won)
• Use derogatory nicknames for other lawmakers

There are so many more but I will spare you.  Folks, this is not acceptable behavior, from anyone, especially not the President of the United States.  To not speak out is un-American.  Would you allow this boorish behaviour if it was your next door neighbor, a co-worker, a fan at the ballpark?  This isn’t a Red vs. Blue issue.  I’m talking about decency.  President Tweet is not a decent person and doesn’t belong in the Oval Office.  He is setting the absolute worst example.

I know a lot of my friends are probably turned off because I have become political.  I can’t help but speak up when I continue to see this joke of a human being degrade our political system, immigrants, women, minorities, the media, Americans with disabilities, and he is peeing all over the rule of law and the Constitution.  November 6, 2018 cannot come soon enough.  The only way for our democracy to survive is to vote for candidates who will not accept this deplorable behavior.

Believe it or not, I hold many conservative values but this president is anything but conservative.  His behavior is downright insulting to all Americans on the right, middle, and left.  All of the democratic institutions we hold dear are being tossed aside as if they were garbage.  I knew he would be unconventional, which is but one reason why I didn’t vote for him, but I didn’t think he would be so petty, emotional, and such an awful human being.  We Americans deserve better.

Decency is not that hard of an ask of any person.  I’m sure being a decent human being would be what you would ask of your children, neighbors, and siblings.  Not only is President Tweet, “that guy,” he’s also the most annoying leader I’ve ever seen.  I can barely listen to him speak publicly.  He blames everyone else for his problems and never accepts responsibility for failure.  I agree with Comey that he is morally unfit for the job.

I’m not perfect, no one is, but I do expect decency especially from the President.  Don’t you?

Oh, how I wish that were true.

I’m not talking about the NCAA Men’s and Women’s Basketball tournament. I’m talking about the madness in Washington, DC that has prevailed since President Tweet’s election as president last January 20th by, no doubt, nefarious means thanks to help from the Russians.

The month of March does, indeed, end today but the chaos in my nation’s capital remains and will for the unforeseeable future. In a little over one year, the casualties of the Tweet Administration has reached 21 people compared to 20 people in 8 years of President Obama! The Tweet’s revolving door style of leadership is anything but acceptable and cannot lead to greater prosperity for the United States of America.  His constantly changing administration can only get anything accomplished by Executive Order, where the Tweet only needs to listen to what is acceptable inside his head. So far, he’s signed 66 E.O.’s, mostly to undo the work of President Obama.  That’s not government leadership to make America great that’s malicious intent to pander to his base of supporters.

It’s obvious that I don’t like President Tweet.  He is not the kind of person I admire and never will.  It’s how he leads that I most object to.  He demands loyalty and admiration without earning it.  But, I’m not naïve.  He has a certain charm that is attractive to some and  I do realize that there’s a large segment of the population who are hurting and who have bought into his rhetoric.  I fault my own Democratic Party for failing to discuss the needs of and come up with solutions for those struggling to get by and who, through blind faith, have put their trust in this narcissist that he will somehow address their unfortunate circumstances.  But, folks, I’m here to tell you, this administration is not the Messiah you seek.  Tax cuts for his wealthy friends are not going to trickle down into your pockets.  All his false promises will result in only further disappointment not jobs.  A border wall isn’t going to make Americans safer.  It will only further divide and isolate the country.

What is really needed is good, old fashioned, investment in the United States of America.  That’s what’s truly going to make the USA great again.  Investment requires taxes, people!  It is taxes which will enable investments in good schools, upgraded infrastructure, a strong military, job creation, homes for the homeless, food for the hungry, counseling for the mentally disturbed, a safe environment, and healthcare for all.  The wealthiest among us have to pay their fair share.  Is this ideal really such a bad idea?

This social media crazed president is not going to lead us to some promised land that only exists in his imagination.  He is the bullshitter’s bullshitter.  He may be the greatest showman of all time and the only person profiting from all of this seems to be his family business and his wealthy friends.  How is this not so painfully obvious to his faithful supporters?  My guess is that they feel there’s no alternative.

There needs to be.  I’m going to hope that on November 6th, a mere 9 months from now, that Americans of voting age will recognize change is needed and vote.  I hope that Democrats will retake the Congress.  President Tweet must be impeached and convicted of violation of his oath to uphold and protect the Constitution.  I hope the next generation of Americans, the Millennials, step up and do more than just complain but return this country to its democratic ideals.  To listen to the needs of the people and to seek solutions for all.   They need to vote.

Perhaps the creation of another political party is necessary.  But, I’m not so much advocating for this as I am a return to some sense of normalcy in our nation’s leadership.  The uncompromising madness in the United States has to stop.  The rule of law must prevail.  The voice of the people must be heard by both parties.  Fairness and democracy is what I’m advocating.  We must evolve.  We must make a significant transition to a place where truly all men and women are created equal.  I remain hopeful that this can happen but it’s not going to come from this president.

It’s time to stop the madness.

My Grandmother Baker was an artist. She painted landscapes mostly of California wilderness settings like a grove of redwood trees, a carpet of ferns, aggressive carnivorous blue jays, and Pacific Ocean waves crashing on rocky shores.  She created oil-based portraits of me and each of my siblings.  She curated at the Santa Cruz Museum of Art & History and was a decades-long member of the Santa Cruz Art League.  At the request of my father, after Dwight Clark caught the winning touchdown pass from Joe Montana to win the National Football Conference Championship game in 1981, she even painted “The Catch.”  I can still smell the tubes of oil paints, the numerous paint brushes in cans filled with turpentine, the wooden palette where she arranged and mixed colors and her wooden easel which folded up like a card table and easily transported in the trunk of her blue Mazda hatchback.

We would take family outings on Sunday’s after Church back when we all lived together on Wanda Court in Santa Cruz and Grandma had her own bedroom to sketch and paint.  During these drives out to Henry Cowell State Park or Big Basin, she would pack her painting gear in the trunk of my dad’s station wagon, along with our lunch, fishing poles and tackle, and picnic utensils. While we went out and played among the giant trees, she would set up her easel, pull out a blank canvas, and with a carbon pencil sketch out what she would later paint in her room.

It is thanks to Grandma I try to visit every art museum I can.  Over the years, I’ve seen exhibits at, besides the Santa Cruz Art Museum, the Museum of Modern Art in San Francisco, Isabella Stuart Gardner Museum and the Museum of Fine Arts in Boston, the Fogg Museum on the Harvard campus, the Getty and the Los Angeles County Museum of Art, the Museum of Latin American Art in Long Beach, the National Museum of Mexican Art in Chicago, the Portland Art Museum, the Phoenix Art Museum, the San Diego Art Museum and the Chicago Art Institute, where my grandmother studied how to become a painter.  I even took an Art Appreciation class at Shasta College, where we studied numerous works in the Art Gallery and wrote about our impressions of the paintings.  Art teaches you the appreciation of our very existence seen through the eyes of another.  An artist expresses their point of view in a uniquely personal way.  Beauty is always in the eye of the artist and I’m so thankful they’re all willing to take the risk and share it.

In High School, I had this profound sense that painting was in my genes, doesn’t everyone like to draw?  But, alas, after one ill fated introduction to Art class, where I could no more produce a poorly drawn stick figure, my focus changed to literary art. I majored in Communication Studies in college and thought my career would turn into a sportswriting career but didn’t work out after several failed attempts.  I turned to work in the international logistics business (another story) and, during a particularly challenging  time when I had lost my job, I went back to school and earned a certificate from UCLA Extension’s Writer’s Program. Several failed attempts at getting one of my short stories published has discouraged me to the point that I now believe my real skill may be in writing essays.

This blog is my opportunity to fulfill my wildest dreams that my literary art may one day speak to someone like the master works from Leonardo da Vinci to Michelangelo to Monet to Frida. A well-written short story or novel moves me in the same way as an incredible painting and my fantasy would be to become that kind of artist. As my writer friend and UCLA professor Tod Goldberg, once said, “If you want to be a writer, you have to write.” Good advice.  So, I’m starting out by writing essays.  I’m writing because I have stories inside of me that I want to write about.  They may never reach the Hemingway level but at least I’m putting my art out there.  I’d like to think you, dear reader, are enjoying what I’m putting on WordPress but in the end my art isn’t about you.  It’s about, like my Grandma, finding one’s own art.